Dating Apps

Dating Apps are truly a rollercoaster, as many of us may know. The whiplash is insanity! I did get lucky because I met my wonderful boyfriend shortly after I started on Hinge. But there were definitely a few toads before my prince! Here's a few of my experiences. So, I always believed in the "meeting organically," to be honest I think it was a cover for me. I had never tried dating apps because I was scared to put myself out there. But that all changed a few years ago. I really wanted to be with someone. I wanted to find "my person." Here are some stories about my search before my boyfriend.

Alright to get into our first story, the first guy I ever met, we'll call him Fred, was nice. We messaged back and forth for a week and decided to meet up for coffee. I was super anxious (still am) about meeting new people but this was my first date. The day came around, I got ready and headed to the coffee shop. I ordered my coffee and sat down. A few minutes later, he arrived. It was incredibly awkward, throughout the whole date. We were both stuttering and nervous laughing trying to keep it from being silent. I told him I was super nervous, so he took my hands, stared at me, and told it was ok. This was a nice gesture but went on for a little too long. I finally pulled my hands away and we went on talking. I asked if he was going to order a drink. He told me he didn't like coffee. This made me feel horrible, as we decided on the coffee shop, and I had a drink myself. He then suggested we go somewhere else, there was a museum a little way away, so we decided to go there. It was small, crowded, and bit musty. We didn't stay for long, then went back to sit outside. We sort of talked but mostly looked around. He asked me if I would go on another date with him, I said sure, he was nice, and I thought we were both a little weird around each other. Then I asked if he would go on another date with me, this is where he proceeded to try and kiss me. I asked what he was doing, he told me "I thought the kiss could be my answer," but I politely declined. I didn't feel like our date gave off "kiss me" energy. We said bye to one another and didn't speak again.

Next, we have Tyler. This one was a little more interesting because we never saw each other in person. We only went off our profile pictures and sent a recent photo through text message. For clarification, we exchanged numbers after talking for a bit on Hinge and he was living far away. We did communicate through phone calls and would talk pretty often. We would play some of the Hinge games and he was very funny. But I noticed we was really into drinking and seemed like a player. I don't have an issue with drinking in moderation, but he would call me drunk several times throughout our talking phase. Talking while he was ordering from a drive-thru and the craziest one, saying my name then tacking his last name onto it. He would go roller skating with his girl "friends" and hold their hands as they skated around the rink. Granted again, he was nice, funny, and we did talk for a while but there were definitely red flags. He told me he would pick me up from my place and we could spend the weekend together in his home state. This was not something I felt comfortable doing so that didn't happen. Nothing came of this "relationship", and we never talked again.

Onto Fred 2.0, I call him this because he literally had the same name as first date Fred. This story is rather short but here goes. We texted each other for a few days before we planned to meet up. We followed each other on Instagram, made loose plans for a date, and then he stopped talking to me. I would reach out and get nothing in response. Then I found out that he blocked me (Super fun) and we never met or talked again. There were a couple more people I talked to in between and after. Some who said they were on vacation and never messaged again, some who were clearly not over their exes, and some with ridiculous standards, that they didn't even hold themselves to.

I'm grateful I did not suffer for long. My boyfriend liked one of my photos, I reached out and the rest is history. I'd never felt more at peace with someone after our first date. We met at a mall, cuddled on a couch, people watched, and talked. It was the best! Until next time. Bye!

Lessons for dating: Be realistic about your standards, be yourself, and don't put yourself or the person you're talking to in a box. Get to know them and of course, trust your gut!